The Angry Phase

A friend told me that I needed to prepare to go through my angry phase of this whole experience. I thought he was making it up, or that maybe he was just an angry person, but maybe I’ve been going through it and wasn’t entirely aware of it.

Looking back at what I wrote yesterday, I was more angry than sad, though I think there was definitely sadness in there as well.

Sometimes it’s really hard when you feel so strongly about everything that you don’t always understand which emotion you’re feeling, and to say such a thing makes you feel broken…

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Emotional Roller Coaster

It’s not even been 72 hours since I was made aware of my relationship blunder, and already my heart and head have run the gambit.

For those of you who know me, you know I’m a big believer in signs, and several things have popped up lately to make me think I should have seen this coming. But even as I start to dwell on that, I’ll spot something on Facebook or Instagram that makes me think that I’m stupid for believing such a thing. Meanwhile my friends are there telling me to relax because while it was a rather big blunder, it’s also very obvious (to them… I’m not so sure) that things will work out positively.

And all in the middle of it all, several of the guys from my past have shown up almost as if the universe is testing me.

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Weekend Coffee Share: An apology is due.

Well, I managed to do it: I screwed up and big time.

If we were sharing our lives over coffee this weekend, let’s make mine Irish.

Because I could use the drink.

I’m still in my jammies. Having done prom last night, and waking up to a not-so-pleasant discussion, I’ve decided today is a day when I’m not going to leave the house. I’ll get to all that in a bit, but first I need to address a few things first. They’re related, so I suppose that helps, but let’s start with the big one:

I owe the Boy an apology.

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Personal update

I started the new year hot and heavy with more postings in a week than I have ever done before. It’s been fun, actually writing and knowing that people were paying attention to what I have to say. This week, however, I’ve been a little MIA. Some of you may remember that I have been taking a little break from teaching. I’ve been struggling with my place in the world. I had lost faith in myself.

I lost faith in myself in a lot of areas, but especially in teaching.

Dont-lose-faith-quotesI had lost faith so much, I was thinking about giving up. I was also thinking about teaching from home. I think that is still a big part of the master plan, but for the moment, I just need a real job again. The tutoring has been nice, I like my kiddos, but it’s also been a hassle as I don’t live in the same area anymore, and I haven’t moved my tutoring to my new area… partially because I’m in a smaller area. Continue reading