Posted in Dating

Why do we divide ourselves? (Part 1)

Occasionally I’ll see something in the news (or, more likely, on Facebook) that makes me particularly introspective. This one in particular also hearkens back to the issues I had with the last guy and the handful of men of a similar ethnic background.

I hate even making that distinction.

I’ve spoken before about how being raised in a family of a different ethnic make-up than my own has given me a particularly different view of the world: I don’t “see” color. I’m told that just saying such a thing is somehow racist because I’m denying the intricacies of a person’s heritage by not acknowledging their race. Or I’m told that people who say that, generally don’t mean it, and yet I do (again, the reason why I hate that I feel the need to make the distinction about several guys of similar ethnic backgrounds and an issue that seems to come from that).

I suppose it would be better to say that I try not to have preconceived notions of a person’s character based on their race, because to me it doesn’t matter where they’re coming from, but where they are and where they’re going and if (at least when thinking about potentially dating them) I want to join them on their journey or have them join mine.

Continue reading “Why do we divide ourselves? (Part 1)”

Posted in Advice, People watching, Releasing Steam

Let me clarify…

It seems I need to explain myself a bit concerning yesterday’s post about Caitlyn Jenner. I apparently offended a friend of mine because he felt I was belittling the transition procedure for those with gender dysphoria by “unfairly comparing it to elective surgery.” This was not my intent. I am very aware how difficult the process is for those who suffer from gender dysphoria.

The fear of not being able to be yourself or the pain that comes from looking in the mirror and seeing someone other than who you truly are must be intense. There are plenty of statistics about the tragedies that befall the trans community: some people would rather commit suicide than live in the wrong body; other people would rather kill their trans neighbors than accept them for who they are.

Obviously the war for equality is still ongoing.

I in no way was trying to insinuate that their transition and the hardships they endure are not extreme. My reason for yesterday’s post was to illustrate that sometimes we do more harm than good by creating labels, or glorifying one person’s experience over another’s.

Yes, Caitlyn Jenner has given a face to those who have felt faceless, and this is a very positive development for the trans community. However, she is hardly the first celebrity to undergo the transition. Remember Chaz Bono? Continue reading “Let me clarify…”