Late last night I posted about my epiphany and how I think I’d lost some friends because of that Last Guy… Today, I need to write a very short (for me) follow up about it, because it hurts. Because I’m frustrated, and since there are several people who aren’t speaking to me, I have nowhere else to vent it but on here.
So a short while ago I started talking about how we separate (or divide, to stick to the title) ourselves into categories and judge each other based on those categories. I had wanted to talk about more serious stuff, but ended up using the whole post to rehash how some of the most recent men in my dating life have stopped seeing me as human, and how it was due to their racial make-up.
No, the irony of me talking about how we shouldn’t categorize people and then me doing that exact thing is not lost on me.
This school year has been more involved than I expected. The result has been that I’ve not been writing. At all. Not on here, not for NaNoWriMo, not even in my new notebook I bought just for writing poetry and things…
Instead, it’s been all lesson plans and grading papers, and making copies, and supporting my kiddos at their games and things.
And occasionally a date here or there.
It’s a good question. How can you tell when something has outlived its usefulness?
This could easily be a post about some of my most recent dating disasters. The Pirate immediately comes to mind, since obviously I wasted way more time on that non-relationship than was necessary. Interesting, since I didn’t mourn the end of things with the Bartender or question it nearly as long as that, even though I was much more invested in him.
But today isn’t a post about relationships. It’s about words.
This week, if we were talking over coffee, I’d tell you that nostalgia has been a major theme in my life of late. Well… if I’m honest, I’ve been going through a great deal of retrospection since the Pirate and I parted ways. Not out of any regret for the way things ended with the Pirate (though it isn’t the way I would have wanted it), but because I was blinded by exactly how many similarities there were with that situation and some of the ones from the past.
Most notably the Boy, but, as we’ve already discussed, it’s the differences in that situation that made the biggest difference to me.
I also feel that I’ve made progress as a human being simply because I was able to walk away with half the self-conflict than I felt during the situation with the Boy.
I suppose it’s that progress, along with the other personal struggles going on right now that have me feeling so nostalgic.
As the summer winds down and the school year is looming larger than life, I find myself thinking about and wondering how I will do. I’m armed with more knowledge about myself and my condition, and that can only help… right? Continue reading
So, the whole world knows that Texas (especially Houston) has been experiencing Apocalyptic levels of rain this past month or so. Followers of this blog also know that grey, nasty days tend to make me want to curl up in a ball and just sleep. I have that Seasonal Affective Disorder, where the lack of sunlight actually causes me to suffer depression. So all this rain has made my performance in life… less than stellar.
In the middle of that, there’s been the end of the school year, which I feel I handled rather well. I had all my paperwork done on time, and was able to get my classroom cleared and ready to go within 3 hours. I actually left stuff in the cabinets, but only because I was told that I could.
I did NOT leave my Serenity Graphic Novel, however. Even though I no longer talk to the man who bought it for me, it is still a treasured item of mine. Continue reading