And then I’d invite you to curl up on the couch with me while we have some soothing music in the background to help reduce my current sense of ire. Continue reading
As we celebrate the turning of the wheel and the sun coming back, so too am I back… Well, for today anyway.
It’s been a while since I wrote, and I need to vent a little bit. So, I guess I’m being a little selfish on this Solstice, but everyone deserves a moment of selfishness every once in a while. It’s been a particularly strange couple of weeks lately, and all I want right now is a stiff drink and a hot bath and maybe a Midol… or five!
Since last I wrote, the semester has finished, I’ve checked a couple of Tinderfellas off the list, made progress (sort of… maybe?) with the one Tinderfella I already knew, and, oh yeah, got rear-ended by a semi-truck.
Well, I’m getting closer to being back on schedule, but I missed the weekend Coffee Share. Having a Three Day weekend makes it extremely difficult to tell what day it is. I woke up this morning thinking it was Sunday, but it’s not. It’s Monday. Labor Day.
I was supposed to go to my mother’s house this weekend to visit. I had been looking forward to it actually, especially because I haven’t been to a Lake Buchanan VFD Labor Day Barbecue in a longish while! I miss the barbecue from back home because they use a different wood, or a different technique. I’m not sure what it is, but it’s better!
I still haven’t found a place that has what I would call good barbecue since I’ve been to Houston, and that is (to a Texan girl) kind of a big deal. Continue reading
One of the things that is important about romance, whether in real life or in fictional works, is the need to feel wanted and to feel worthy of being wanted. Something came up with a conversation with a friend last night, where he started to tell me that eventually I might be confident enough to see myself as worthy. It upset me a great deal, and I immediately jumped down his throat and told him not to lecture me.
It took me all night and into this morning (in the shower) to realize what it was I was really angry about.
Well. I survived. I think that’s about all I can say about Inservice today.
Which is obviously a lie as I’m about to go into complete detail about what happened and why it was such an exhausting experience. And believe me, I am extremely exhausted!
This week, if we were talking over coffee, I’d tell you that nostalgia has been a major theme in my life of late. Well… if I’m honest, I’ve been going through a great deal of retrospection since the Pirate and I parted ways. Not out of any regret for the way things ended with the Pirate (though it isn’t the way I would have wanted it), but because I was blinded by exactly how many similarities there were with that situation and some of the ones from the past.
Most notably the Boy, but, as we’ve already discussed, it’s the differences in that situation that made the biggest difference to me.
I also feel that I’ve made progress as a human being simply because I was able to walk away with half the self-conflict than I felt during the situation with the Boy.
I suppose it’s that progress, along with the other personal struggles going on right now that have me feeling so nostalgic.
As the summer winds down and the school year is looming larger than life, I find myself thinking about and wondering how I will do. I’m armed with more knowledge about myself and my condition, and that can only help… right? Continue reading