Posted in Dating

Summer Romance Tradition

A couple years ago I tried to very briefly discuss what was the cause of the Summer Romance. I talked about the skimpiness of the clothing, and the historical traditions of the Spring/Summer festivals in the Pagan traditions. I was trying to rationalize something that may not be able to be rationalized.

We really like our Summer Romances!

Whether it’s the weather or not, I have noticed my libido is ramped up a bit. And by “a bit,” I mean a ton! This is either really good for the Pirate or really bad for me. Only time will tell on that front. Keep your fingers crossed for me because I really like him!


But personal life aside, there is something of a tradition of a fling or romance that lasts for only the summer. There’s this expectation of some no strings attached romance that happens only because the two parties are on vacation from their normal lives, and it’s an interesting concept, given that we no  longer live in a world where the financial world is dependent on the seasons.

Once upon a time, the summers were a time to work the fields and that took precedent over other forms of business (and school) because we needed to make sure we had food! In this day and age, there’s not a need to shut down for plowing and harvesting the fields… at least not in most parts of the world, thus the majority of the world isn’t stuck on that cycle.

So, while students (and teachers) get summers off,  I’m learning with the Pirate, that the normal world does NOT in fact get the summers off. Summer, during high school and college, is a mystical time, like Spring Break, where you can leave your cares behind and enjoy the freedom of a vacation. There are no real responsibilities because you’re not worrying about your coursework (unless you’re one of those overachievers who takes summer classes) and you can go explore the world via a trip to some tropical locale.


Not that I’ve ever done such a thing… well at least not to anywhere tropical.

I did spend a summer in Kansas City one year, and I definitely took advantage of the wanton atmosphere of the summer. There are some… interesting, and slightly scandalous stories that I could tell from that summer. One of which began with a blind date and ended with me going with three strangers to a particular type of club… one in which a lady should not go.

In retrospect, I’m kind of lucky I didn’t end up dead on the side of the road somewhere because no one knew me there, and no one from back home knew where I was. But it was a different time in my life where I had more faith in my luck. Actually, I believed pretty strongly in destiny, and nothing like a small adventure could derail me from that destiny.

I no longer know what that destiny is, so don’t ask, but I hope I find some faith in it again.


But now, while I get to sleep in and make my own work schedule over the summer, the rest of the world still has a set schedule. And even though I get to make my own hours, I still have responsibilities, unlike that summer in Kansas City.

So, is a summer romance even feasible at this point in life?

I’m not sure, but it’s definitely still a thing worth looking into, though I would prefer a summer romance being the prelude to something more permanent. At least in one particular situation.

See, in my personal life, I am beginning a romance of sorts with the Pirate…well hopefully. Seriously, I can’t really read him, and I don’t know which of us is more hesitant. Though he did finally acknowledge that he’s been kind of a bad person in the way he completely monopolizes the conversation and doesn’t talk to me like I’m human unless we’re being intimate.

When he acknowledged it, I was afraid that he was gearing up for a brushoff. Usually when a guy admits that he sees how I’m right about his crappy behavior, he’s using that as an excuse to tell me I should NOT spend time with him. And, somewhat similarly, the Pirate said it made him question why I would want to spend time with him, if he was such a tool… which has been hard for me to explain even to myself.

I see two versions of him, and I’m still trying to determine which is the real one.


Is he primarily the douchebag who can’t see past his own nose and monopolizes conversations, judging everyone around him and trying to make himself look better? Or is he primarily the sweet and sensual guy whose touch sends sparks shooting through my body in a good way as he rubs the tips of my fingers and listens intently to every word I say?

I’m hoping he’s the second guy, and the first is him being nervous and trying not to give in to his baser desires by ignoring the fact that I exist so we don’t rush into a sex only relationship.

There’s evidence to support him being both guys. Only time will tell…


But then there’s the Teacher. He actually texted this morning… I’m aware that if anything were to happen with him, it would only be a Summer Fling/Romance. He seems definitely on the rebound. His marriage hasn’t been over a year yet, and he’s out looking for someone to fill that hole in his life. I’m not sure I want that position. In fact, I’m really sure I don’t… but if things with the Pirate go bad, I could see how we could comfort each other for the summer.

You know, in that true Summer Romance, “love is only an illusion” sort of way.


Meanwhile, tonight on #JustAddTea, we’ll be discussing this Summer Romance tradition:

  • Sharing our stories of the good and the bad.
  • Talking about good summer romance movies.
  • Discussing good destinations for such an experience.
  • Maybe even looking at fictional characters for said romance!

So come join our Twitter party tonight at 8 pm Central time (9pm Eastern, 6 pm Pacific) to discuss the joys and pitfalls of the Summer Romance! Hope to see you there!




High school teacher by day, relationship/romance blogger by night. Help me add author to the list. Vote for my book idea here:

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