While thinking about this one, I think I figured out my fascination with intelligent and yet handsome guys. My first celeb crush was Doogie Howser, MD, played by a very young Neil Patrick Harris.
I was only 8 when that show started, and I’m kind of brilliant, so I relate to him.
I know, I don’t seem brilliant. Don’t judge me on my writing style here… I’ve spent many years learning how to hide my intelligence because in Texas smart women aren’t exactly valued. People see how I look (specifically that I’m a bit busty), and assume I don’t have a brain. I don’t dress nerdy, and while I wear glasses, that’s no longer a sign of geekiness. And I don’t wear them that often…
Even the Boy, in our early conversations, told me I didn’t seem particularly geeky. We were talking in Facebook chat, and out of nowhere he asked me what was my “geek.” Apparently I wasn’t nerdy enough. When I told him about my fascination with the Sims, he told me that that was what he’d been waiting for, or at least an example of what he would have expected from someone who was truly a geek…something along those lines.
It was well over a year ago. I’m doing pretty good to remember it at all.
The point being that in Texas, a busty woman who spends any time at all attempting to be fashionable is expected to not be smart. And even if she is, she’s expected to just roll over and do as her man says.
Well, I’m not exactly that girl. I want a dominant man, yes, but I want him to earn my respect enough for me to be submissive to him. Which means he has to prove his intelligence, his passion, his loyalty. I don’t just take men at their word… I try, but there’s yet to be one who hasn’t proven that lying is his first instinct. Even when they say that we’ll be honest with one another, there is always something.
I think that is why I really liked Doogie Howser.
He was obviously smart, being a prodigy and all. His passion was strong enough that he began his career when most people his age were just beginning to have an inkling of what they might do when they grew up. And because it was a sitcom in the late 80’s and early 90’s, he was loyal to a fault!
Television shows used to have positive messages for the people… unlike today’s reality television that emphasizes the negative side of the human condition. I’m specifically thinking of shows like “The Bad Girls Club,” which even in the name glorifies bad behavior. I’ve had students in the past tell me that I’m wrong when I say not to use violence to solve your problems because so-and-so on that show would handle the situation in such-and-such violent way.
It brings to mind that question about art imitating life or vice versa.
But Doogie Howser, he was a child genius, handsome for his age, and an all around perfect young male for my pre-pubescent fantasies. And he grew up to play Hedwig from Hedwig and the Angry Inch, who sings my favorite love song! So I guess in a way, I love him still.